Yesterday morning, while getting ready to leave the house, I gave my two sons a kiss and hug goodbye. Then I knelt down and gave my dog a kiss. And then I very nearly walked out the door before realizing I had forgotten to include my husband in the goodbyes.
What did he think of this, you may ask? I’ll tell you: He stared at me in hurt wonder.
The dog has been ours for over two years now, and I am completely smitten with him, as he is me. He is my constant companion, my pillow, my snuggle friend. He sits on my lap — or very nearly on it — most days of the week. My kids go to school, my husband goes to work, my dog comes to my lap while I settle in to work from home. When I sit at the kitchen counter eating breakfast and working, he sits at my feet.
If we all leave together, the dog will wait until I’m back in the house to celebrate upon returning. He needs to be greeted by me and me alone in the morning (even though he sleeps at my feet) before being let outside in the morning. He seems to really only like it when I “make” (i.e. put out dog food with, ok yes, some leftover burger meat) his meals. He hates going for walks with my husband, instead looking towards the house for me. He follows me into the bathroom. That’s just the natural order of things in my house of late.
I will admit that my husband is right: the dog is barky; he hates the mailman and — like most dogs — can hear the garbage men coming from a mile away. But I swear he reserves those big bug, teary-eyed looks for me and me alone.
All this to say, the dog has become a third kid, and I think my husband is starting to resent me for it.
To be fair, my husband, despite his best efforts to show otherwise, loves this dog. I will find him snuggling or rolling around on the ground with the dog. He enjoys running around with him in the backyard. Still, the amount of affection I have for this animal — and OK, how it takes away from the affection I give to my spouse — seems to irk him. It probably doesn’t help that I adore watching my kids interact with him as if he were a human child.
After all, I was the one who pushed for the dog. I wanted a companion during the day, working from home, and I believe — through no real scientific evidence — that kids who grow up with dogs are just nicer people later on in life. But maybe I pushed too hard; maybe my need for a project, as it were, clouded my thinking about how the household dynamics would change.
Then again, household dynamics always change, as kids grow up and people evolve. So maybe this is our new(ish) dog-related normal. That… or the ole motto of “happy wife, happy life” will win the day. Only time will tell.
