Nothing feels warmer to me than a ‘90s Christmas. And I’m not good at psychoanalyzing, but even I know it’s because that’s the Christmas era of my childhood, and there was nothing more lovely than my mom decorating the Christmas tree, baking us cookies, and tucking us into bed at night.
That’s why I’m so obsessed with all the kitschy Christmas accessories. Case in point: I think it’s high time we bring back the holiday turtleneck.
You know in Christmas with the Kranks, when Jamie Lee Curtis’ character finds out her daughter is coming home early from the Peace Corps to celebrate Christmas with her family? Instead of telling her daughter they’ve actually booked a cruise, she jumps right into formation — insisting on all the Christmas decor they always have out, wanting to rush straight out to the grocery store to pick up a Hickory Honey Smoked Ham (“Blair’s favorite!” she shouts), even sending her husband out last minute to get the items for a caramel cream pie (also Blair’s favorite).
But before she can do any of that, she needs her vest.
There are tons of great Christmas looks available. I know a turtleneck seems dated. I know you already have cute sweaters and cardigans and viral bow shoes. But look — Christmas takes a lot of WORK. And that work comes from moms. So wearing a fancy Christmas dress or a sweater with sleeves that keep falling down as you hang ornaments and roll out sugar cookie dough? It’s not happening.
The compressive nature of a turtleneck means you can wear it under a baggier sweater or a vest. It keeps you warm without overheating you. It has just enough of a festive touch to put you in the Christmas spirit.
And it really makes you feel like the ultimate ‘90s holiday mom.
Holiday brooches, fun earrings, and those cute sequin Santa hats? All great options. But nothing makes me want to bake cookies with my kids and watch the 1999 Mickey’s Once Upon a Christmas classic like a holiday turtleneck. You can dress them up, dress them down, wear them with leggings or jeans or a skirt. When people see you in them, they’ll think, “Now there’s a woman who I bet has her own favorite sugar cookie recipe written on a card somewhere. That woman has a splattered Christmas cookbook from 1992 that she still uses. That woman? She’s Christmas coziness personified.”
And you didn’t even get it from an Instagram influencer swipe-up link.
